Checklist, check. Planning, getting there.

So I'm trying to get better about the whole stay at home mom thing and I actually got two loads of laundry done yesterday (including folding and putting away) which for me is huge. Today Jim is home and we are spending the afternoon together. Okay, so he's asleep on the couch and the boy is upstairs napping and I am sitting in front of my computer listening to football and thinking how I should be working on another load of laundry. Anyway. . . I digress. So I am trying to get better at the stay at home mom/housewife thing. But I have a question, and forgive me if I have asked this question before but I really don't understand. Why do women (or the person responsible - in my house and experience it falls to women), who do we always have to come up with the meal plan? Why can't husbands ever take the reins, decide on a meal, and execute. I just feel like I have to plan these things and if I haven't started the day before I probably will be pulling out another jar of spaghetti sauce, ground beef, noodles and salad. LAME!!! Today (again!) I asked Jim what he might want for dinner and he gave me the usual answer "I have no idea, I can't think that far ahead." Honestly, if he can't think that far ahead then why do I have to be able to do that. Can't I just live in the moment too? Apparently I missed that in the marriage contract. No, no, we have to plan for all things. Whether it be 5 minutes from now or 5 years. This includes any and all scenarios such as sunburn because we decided to spontaneously go to the Garden of the Gods for a hike ("what do you mean you don't have water, don't you think of these things?") Or a baby having a poopy diaper in the middle of the grocery store with a basket full of groceries and no changing table in the restroom. Or what about the husband who flies into town so we can go directly to a football game and he needs a change of clothes along with the baby, all of his diapers and bottles for an entire day out, oh and don't forget his toothbrush because hubby doesn't want to have coffee breath.

Yes, we missed the implication in the wedding vows, marriage contract, the look in the hubby's eyes, all of which said that we are the keepers of the schedule. We will take care of all appointments for the children, all meal planning, the care of houseguests, feeding schedules, laundry schedules, regular cleaning, family entertainment, coordination and management of any repair persons and repair of small household items. But, in the alternative this is also why the husbands end up with the infamous "honey-do" list. I mean in business one person is not expected to complete all of their own tasks, they have to delegate. That's where we come in, we get to delegate to our husbands. As household managers we have to rely on the other members of the household to help, but the thinking, forethought, planning, etc. is all up to us. So in the future, when your husband complains about having to do something on his list, just remind him that a lot of planning went into that list and his inability to complete such paltry tasks are merely a consequence of his lack of planning.

Am I a Bad Person?

That's a rhetorical question! I don't want an answer.

Finally, we can breathe a sigh of relief that Jim's job is secure. I no longer have to worry about my husband calling me to tell me his on his way to pack up his apartment and return home because he is unemployed. Not that I wouldn't love to see his shining face every day, but the thought of no income with an infant and a house is terrifying. Perhaps it's a little selfish to say how lucky I feel that I can stay home with my son and I love every moment, so Jim's continued employment is key to my continued unemployment. That being said there are times when I would love to have Jim here all the time so that I could do the little things. Like getting my hair done, or completing laundry in one day rather than it being a daily task. I swear I have no idea what I am doing and why it takes me so long. On the other hand, I do tend to goof off a lot because I know I have time later. Of course later never seems to come or it comes sooner rather than later (ha ha!). I should be spending less time playing on the floor with the baby and more time getting stuff done but I just don't seem to be motivated to do that.

Some of the other moms with more kids than I have get more done than I can ever manage. Although on the days that I do manage to get out of my PJ's before lunch and get out of the house, I get plenty of things done. But when that only happens once every two weeks that seems to be a problem. Well, now that I am done procrastinating I will go change out of my PJ's and into some real clothes so that I can hopefully get something done around here. Hmmm, I wonder if the baby wants to play?

Thoughts on Daily Life

Okay, I have a confession. I really have no idea what I'm doing with all of this. The other night I was putting the baby to bed and I have to be honest I actually started to cry and think that perhaps I made a mistake having a baby since I am completely clueless on what to do with him. In addition, I am trying to figure out what I am supposed to be doing with myself. Should I be cleaning, filing, organizing, what?

I got all excited the other day because a new crockpot cookbook was coming out and decided that I had to have it. Really? Seriously? Yes, it's true. I vacuum my house at least twice a week and I have even kept up with watering my plants. Now granted, I only have one child and he is very young, but shouldn't I be doing something more?

Well, I am excited to report that I am going to participate in the National Novel Writing Month (aka NaNoWriMo) starting on Nov. 1 and I will try to write 50,000 words by the end of the month. We'll see how it goes, I am keeping my goals rather low so I am not terribly disappointed with myself. I have no grandiose aspirations of being the next John Grisham, or Dan Brown (haha), but I just really like to tell stories. Lately I have been having these weird ghostly dreams so I may have to work on those tales a bit. And I also have had some strange ideas surrounding vampires (which btw I have had for about 8-10 years so I am not jumping on the bandwagon). Because of all of the vampire lit coming out I am not sure I want to venture into that market since I am concerned it may be oversaturated. I am also toying with some real life based suburban mom stuff, but as you can tell from my anemic (at best) postings I have not had as much time to write as I would like.

That's about all for now. I have to go and fold some laundry. 10 o'clock at night and I am concerned about sheets getting wrinkled in the dryer. What am I doing??? Oh and I am trying to figure out what to make for dinners over the next couple of days. What's that? Meal planning? I must be on drugs.

Oh, speaking of drugs, I actually got into a small online debate about the flu shot today. I don't understand the whole paranoia surrounding the flu shot. I have gotten a flu shot for the last 4 years consistently. It would have been longer, but there was one year of a shortage and it was not available for me to get one. Apparently there are people who fear that we will all fall victim to horrible side effects from the shots. Frankly if you research the incidence of SERIOUS side effects they are few and far between and could be attributed to a maelstrom effect due to numerous other issues in conjunction with the flu shot. Anyway, I could not believe that I was actually taking the time (albeit about 20 minutes) to debate about the incidence of dystonia in people who have received the seasonal flu shot.

Oh well, such is the life. Now back to my laundry. Perhaps tomorrow I will mop the kitchen, and finish some sewing. So much for fighting off the stereotypes.

Saturdays in Suburbia

So the other day as I was walking home from my sister in law's house the sun was setting and I looked at the green velvet lawns all clipped in pretty little striped patterns with the summery smell of freshly cut grass and realized that this is one of the things I just love about suburbs. Saturday evenings you get that glorious summer smell of barbecues and freshly mowed lawns and it just feels a little more like summer time (even when it's not). It's the time of year when I picture families in their backyards, dad hovering with his tongs or spatula over the grill. A stream of smoke coming from the side and billowing up into a blue-pink sky. The kids are playing (yeah right, more like screaming and fighting over a toy or whose turn it is, but hey let's take a moment in la la land shall we?) and the neighbors might even be sitting on the deck in perfectly matched patio furniture with a cool beverage (cocktail, beer, whatever) chatting about today's little league game or junior's latest attempt at riding a bike without training wheels. Scraped knees and slight sunburn adorn the children and maybe one or two adults. The lady next door asks how your vegetable garden is coming along and you compare notes on how much you water, how many weeds you pulled, and what the rabbits are eating. Ah summer! If only you would never end. The long, lazy days, and those wonderful evenings when it cools off enough to leave the windows open. Summer, you romance us with your smells, sights and sounds, only to break our hearts when you start to burn up the lawn and force the children to say "we're bored, what can we do?" Ah yes, you seduce us like a new lover, letting us enjoy your warm, sunny days with slight breezes and maybe a brief shower. Allowing the children to play in your sunshine and green grass filled days. We know it won't last, soon you'll be searing us with your oppressive heat and stifling us in our homes, we'll wish for fall and the beginning of school so we can get a break from the heat and the kids. I love the beginning of summer, but just like a romance, I hate the end.

Let me Introduce Myself

I am a new suburban housewife. This is not how I pictured myself ten years ago, but here I am. In suburbia. I have one child (an infant), a four bedroom home in a nice neighborhood, with a dog and an SUV. How much more suburbia can you get? This is definitely not how I expected my life to turn out, but this is where the long and winding road has taken me. I was not the little girl who dreamed of being a stay at home mom, housewife, etc. I thought that I would be able to balance a career and be a good wife and mother. That sounds like the typical modern woman right? Please don't misunderstand, I am certainly not suggesting that there is anything wrong with being a housewife or what I am doing, it's just not what I expected. Kudos to all the ladies out there doing the same thing, cause let me tell ya, it's not as easy as you think. And I'm just at the beginning. My brother says you are not truly a parent until you have more than one child. I am inclined to agree with him. With one you know exactly who did it and who to punish. I mean really, there are only so many things you can blame on the dog. Besides, after a while the dog is going to start wising up and avoid being anywhere near the scene of the crime.

So this is where I will tell the tales of suburbia (as I see them). I doubt it will be anything like Desperate Housewives, but you never can tell. I will try not to bore you with my daily battle against dirt and grime, but stories of the false boobs, tight jeaned, haute mamas of suburbia who may or may not be living their dream. Oh, and I can't guarantee that I won't take some creative liberties, but names will be changed to protect the innocent . . . or the guilty.